After 8 weeks of tandem nursing I still haven’t decided whether I love it or hate it. I think that’s because the truth is I love it AND hate it. If you printed off a transcript of my thoughts, you would find all of the following sentences within it, sometimes in the course of a single day:
“Aw, both my babies curled up in my lap, does it get any better than this?”
“If you people don’t get the f*** off of me, I’m going to scream!”
—–
“I swear if I hear ‘my some boobies’ one more time…”
“I’m sick of Lego, can’t we just have some boobies?”
—–
“So glad he’s getting boob juice again so I don’t have to worry so much about his diet.”
“Crap, now that he’s getting so much boob juice I have to limit his cheese intake.”
—–
“I wish he’d stop clamping his top teeth into me, it hurts!”
“When doesn’t use his teeth it feels really……….. gross.”
—–
“Why won’t she nurse to sleep like he did so I can lie down?”
“Why didn’t I just put her to sleep in the sling, laying here is so boring.”
—–
“Seriously, when am I going to stop getting engorged?”
“Shit, I haven’t been engorged at all today – has my milk dried up??!!”
—–
“When am I supposed to find time to pump when I’ve got 2 boobaholics?”
“F***, pumping sucks. Why am I doing it?”
—–
“Look at the way he tickles her while they’re nursing. What a lovely brother.”
“Stop touching her, she’s finally asleep and you’re going to wake her up!”
—–
—–
Nothing’s perfect, I guess!
